November 29, 2019
| By DJL Counselling & Mediation Consultancy
Feeling angry is the common response of being threatened or frustrated. It may also sometimes be the secondary response to loneliness, sadness or fear. Anger often and to an extreme degree may impact a relationship and an individual’s psychological well-being as well as his/her quality of life. However, suppressing and storing anger can have a damaging & lasting impact on an individual. There are various tools as well as techniques that can help a person come to the terms with anger triggers & respond them in a healthy manner.
What do you mean by anger management?
Anger management is all about the skills, which help with recognising the signs of being angry and dealing triggers positively. It is important for a person to recognise anger at an initial stage and express his/her needs when being calm & in control. Anger management doesn’t involve holding the anger in or avoiding any associated feeling. Coping with it is the acquired skill. Any person can learn to control anger with patience, dedication and time.
However, when anger is affecting a relation negatively or escalating to other kinds of behaviour like physical abuse, counselling support and therapy is the only solution. In such a case, all that’s needed is the professional help of experts who offer anger management counselling in Melbourne.
So, if you think it is you or you know someone who is struggling to manage anger, consider contacting a counsellor.
How to control anger?
According to Dr Jane Leigh, our principal psychotherapist and founder, there are 3 main steps to control anger. They include spotting the early signs, giving oneself the much needed time as well as space for processing the triggers, and using techniques, which can help to control anger.
Spot the early signs
Anger may be difficult to stop when it is in its track. So, it is better to detect the emotions early and redirect the thought process to a constructive place. What happens basically when you sense anger is that you feel the rush of adrenaline all through your body – this is the time when you react without having any control on yourself. With the adrenaline, you will notice a faster breathing, a quick heartbeat, tension all through your body, pacing, restlessness and tapping of your feet, clenched fists as well as jaw, or trembling and sweating. Spot these signs early – they will give you the chance to stop & think about how you would want to react to any situation.
Take a step back
Buy some time for yourself to limit your angry response. This would involve easy & simple measures. So, when confronted with any kind of trigger, count 1-10, go for a walk or get in touch with a person who isn’t immediately involved like a family member, friend or counsellor. This would help in defusing the situation & clearly recognising the cause of your intense feeling. Anyone in Melbourne, who wants to voice his/her anger may contact support groups like DLJ Counselling & Mediation Consultancy, for assistance.
Apply anger management techniques
Anger management techniques can help a person to calm down. Different tactics are effective for different persons so finding the method, which works may be instrumental to defuse episodes of extreme anger.
Some of the techniques are:
Breath slowly and deeply: Focus on every breath when it is moving in & out, and try to spend more time to exhale than inhale.
Ease the physical tension: Try to tense each part of body by counting 1-10 and the releasing it.
Mindfulness: Meditating is an instance of mindfulness tactic and may help divert the mind from anger at the time of trigger moments, especially after a consistent practice.
Exercise: Physical activity is the best way of using up the excess adrenalin. A brisk walk or walk or combat sports like martial arts or boxing, may be useful outlets for confrontational or aggressive feelings.
Alternative ways: Tear newspapers, crush ice cubes over the sink or scream or punch into the pillow – these are great alternative ways of anger management.
Distract yourself: Distract yourself by dancing to some energetic and upbeat tunes, drawing, journal writing or taking a shower.
Anger management therapy
Anger management therapy reduces the feelings that anger creates by enabling people to explore the probable causes, triggers as well as confront the underlying problems. Available in form of 1:1 session or group, anger management therapy basically works in addressing specific kinds of anger issues using mindfulness and cognitive behavioural therapy.
Main aims of the therapy:
Recognising why you often get angry
Changing the way you basically respond to the issue
Learning the skills for handling anger in an effective manner
Teaching you to use anger in a way that motivates or solves any problem
Teaching you to communicate in an effective way
Anger is a healthy and natural emotion. Managing it is essential. It may help you in reaching your goals, solving your problems and rebuilding those damages, which might have occurred because of your aggression.